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God recently revealed to me that I was holding on to shame. If you’ve read any of my previous blogs, you may hear that and think, “Well, yeah, you recently went through a divorce.” I thought the same thing. But the shame God wanted to heal me of ran much deeper. That’s why God had to reveal it to me.

The shame I was battling with internally actually played a part in why I got married to begin with. The marriage ending only added to the shame that pre-existed.

Before you assume that this is a woe is me story, let me reassure you, it’s not. Understanding the roots of the shame that had continued to resurface in my life is what led to my freedom. Sure, I could talk about the injustices I suffered throughout life, but I am actually grateful for every negative experience I’ve had. They all contributed to my quest for love. Without a reason to question my existence, I may have never found it.

Though rocky and consequential at times, that painful journey led me to the ultimate love – Jesus Christ. And that’s what I want to share with you today. My greatest moments of shame are what became precious opportunities for God to reveal the depths of His love for me.

And this love isn’t for particular people – it has always been a part of God’s character and plan for all of us. God wants to heal us of shame. I can prove it. Let’s look at one of the sweetest moments between God and a Samaritan woman in the bible.

God Meets You Where You Are

In John 4, Jesus deliberately makes His way to a well in Samaria. Unlike today, when we can swing by a person’s house because we were in the neighborhood, Jesus was on foot. Not only that, it was incredibly hot. Yet and still, Jesus determines to journey to a well outside the city he was heading to at one of the hottest times of the day (roughly noon). There, he meets a Samaritan woman who has walked to this well by herself. This was not the custom of that time. Why was she alone? Why did she not walk with all the other women who, by custom, made this trek together in the morning when it’s much cooler?

Her presence at the well at this particular time of day tells us a lot about her situation, but her conversation with Jesus can help us learn more – let’s look at it (John 4:7).

7 A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” 8 (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) 9 The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.)

Right here, we see that she is more concerned with modern-day customs versus who Jesus truly is. This is ironic because custom says she shouldn’t be at the well alone or at this time of day, so why is she suddenly concerned with custom. Jesus redirects her attention to that.

10 Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.”

This is such a compelling way for Jesus to introduce Himself, not only as a gift, but also as one who wants to leave her with a gift. Her interest is piqued, though she’s still doubtful.

11 The woman said to him, “Sir, you have nothing to draw water with, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? 12 Are you greater than our father Jacob? He gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.”

Looking at Jesus in the natural, she can’t help but notice that he doesn’t even have a bucket to provide this water, but she’s still curious about this water he speaks of.

13 Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

This is where it gets interesting to me. Prior to this statement from Jesus, the Samaritan woman has been hyper-focused on custom, what she sees versus what Jesus is saying, and what she believes is possible. Yet, when Jesus references a water that will become in her a spring of water welling up to eternal life – something that sounds extremely far-fetched from a natural perspective – she completely overlooks that. Her desire to never being thirsty again outweighs her need for understanding.

A Desire for God is All You Need

15 The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.”

Reading this line the other night (when God revealed that I was struggling with shame), I began to weep. Because, for the first time after reading this story many times before, I resonated deeply with what this woman was feeling.

I heard the cry of a woman who was so sick of her situation, so tired of having to do life the way she had, so drenched in shame and tossed aside by society, that the promise of never having to return to this well – this reminder of her shame – sounded like the best promise ever. Though it made no physical sense (because how could she never need water again), the offer appealed to deeper pain, the deeper thirst she had: shame.

Jesus knew this about her, and knew that he could appeal to the deeply rooted shame she felt. She thinks that this water is what she wants, but Jesus knew that freedom from shame was truly what she wanted. Now that he has her attention, he speaks directly to that.

16 Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” 17 The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; 18 for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.”

Jesus asks her a very personal question, to which she could have denied him an answer, or simply lied about. Instead, she told the truth. We’ll see why this matters in a moment.

19 The woman said to him, “Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet. 20 Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you say that in Jerusalem is the place where people ought to worship.”

Recognizing that he gleaned this information divinely, she immediately questions him about a barrier (another custom) that has prevented her from worshipping God. What this reveals is her desire to worship God, the perfect heart posture for what God wants to do in and through her. This is key to point out, because despite her past or her place in society, she has not allowed life to steal her desire for God.

Own Your Truth – Don’t Hide It

21 Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe me, the hour is coming when neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. 22 You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. 24 God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.”

God then takes this opportunity to do two things. He first gives her insight (a revelation) into what’s to come – a time when anyone can worship God anywhere. He then affirms her by saying the time is now for true worshippers who will worship God in spirit and in truth. Remember, earlier he made a point to say that what she said about her situation was “true.” He sees the posture of her heart (to be honest) and points out that that is all she’ll need to worship God.

This is what sets us free from shame. If we want freedom from everything that makes us want to hide, we have to be willing to be honest with God. Yes, he knows everything about you. But you have to acknowledge your need for Him. Otherwise, He has no room (or permission) to enter into your heart or your situation. Tell God exactly how you feel – the good, the bad, the ugly. Tell God exactly what you’ve struggled with – the good, the bad, the ugly. Your foundation of truth is what makes way for THE truth to come in (Christ) and give you the freedom, joy and peace He’s been eagerly wanting to give you.

A Beautiful Exchange Awaits You

As beautiful as this exchange must have felt to her, God still had so much more up his sleeve.

25 The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming (he who is called Christ). When he comes, he will tell us all things.”

Hearing this, she is so ecstatic that what was in her heart (her desire for God) spills out. And she gets to experience for the first time – before anyone else – a revelation that will change the world forever.

26 Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am he.”

With so few words, Jesus has done something miraculous. This woman had been eagerly awaiting the arrival of the Messiah and not only did he reveal himself to her, but he did it in a place where she once felt shame. Now, when she thinks of the well, she will think of Jesus instead of thinking of her past… instead of thinking of her shame… instead of thinking of all the things that try to diminish her worth.

She was eager to learn about the living water Jesus offered so that she’d never have to feel shame at the well again. Yet, God wanted to do something greater. He wanted to free her of that shame completely, the shame that lingered long after she left that well. The shame that taunted her when no one was around.

But wait, there’s more. Jesus also wanted to change her life beyond the well. He wanted to give her a whole new identity.

After learning that Jesus was the Messiah, the Samaritan woman runs into town to tell everyone. When the people realized that she was telling the truth, they made an effort to come back and share that with her.

Saying (John 4:42): After learning that Jesus was the Messiah, the Samaritan woman runs into town to tell everyone. When the people realized that she was telling the truth, they made an effort to come back and share that with her.

The woman who was once known for (and shunned) for her reputation, was now the woman who met the Messiah. Jesus wanted to heal her of shame AND restore her identity.

This is exactly what God wants to do for us today. He isn’t only the God of physical healing, He’s the God of emotional healing. He wants to heal your shame, your insecurities, your self worth and give you a new identity. All you need is the desire (ask Him to reveal Himself to you), and the courage to be honest (tell him the truth about how you feel or how you’re doing). And friend, He will meet you right where you are.

Thank you for reading!